The Story of hey.com
One sunny day a travelling salesman approached a down on his luck gambler in the town square. Hey you! That's right you! What do you think of your current email provider? Not much eh? I hear you there.
I was once like you. Lost, confused, scared. That was until I started using hey.com! The best damn email provider on the internet!
The gambler began to perk up and just then a man who was clearly David Heinemeier Hansson wearing a fake moustache piped up from the forming crowd. But mister!
he questioned, "what makes this hey.com so great and awesome?"
Well my non-suspicious friend I'll tell you!
said the salesman, Has anyone here ever received spam emails?
Boooooooooooo
, shouted the crowd in unison and one man died on the spot.
The salesman chuckled. Now, now
he murmured stepping over the dead body. We've all gotten spam but what have any of you done about it? Cowards the lot of you!
The crowd hung their heads in shame. Cries of Please help us!
and We'll pay anything!
rang out.
Well with hey, spam is a thing of the past! You can screen emails before they even get to your imbox.
Imbox? Don't you mean inbox
, squeaked a small child.
"Stupid child", bellowed the salesman, "the inbox is no more and the imbox is your new best friend! All your important mail goes there.
God bless you sir
, cried the child!
Indeed he shall
, the salesman muttered under his breath. Our salesman then went on the extol the virtues of hey's many other features such as spy tracker blocking and the ability to send large files.
The salesman regaled the townsfolk with tales of hey's greatness until it was time to take the large sacks of money the people paid him back to base camp.
hey.com: An Email Provider for the People
Author's note: This is not the story of hey.com. I was just writing some thoughts on the service (which I love) and things got out of hand!
This is my day 44 post for #100daystooffload
This work by Thomas Lloyd is licensed under CC BY-SA 4.0
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If you have comments / questions send an email to thomas.lloyd@hey.com
You can also contact me on Mastodon where my account is @thmslld@fosstodon.org